An Open Letter To The Couple Sitting Behind Me At The Movies Last Night
Hi there. First off, let me start by saying how utterly adorable you were with your snuggles and your giggles and your little whispers of nothing. You looked such the picture of new, young love--complete comfort without the complacency that familiarity often breeds--that you warmed the cockles of my cold, dead heart.
And then proceeded to fan that spark into a towering inferno of annoyance.
Look, I'll lay it out for you. Unlike you, I was not at the cheap theatre catching the 9:00 showing of Pirates of the Caribbean 3 because I had nothing better to do on a Saturday night. Ok, sure, Facebook Guy was cryptic and ambiguous when faced with the possibility of making plans, leading me to decide that an actual date with myself was preferable to a psuedodate with him, but that's not the point here. The point is, it took me four months for the planets to align and time and space to fold in on themselves in such a way that sitting in the theatre ogling Johnny Depp as a sexually ambiguous yet still shower nozzle worthy pirate was actually an option for me. And then you two decided that you were bored, and hey, why not go to the movies? After all, the cheap theatre is only $3 now. You can't rent a new release for that!
What I'm trying to say here is that I did not pay that teenager thirty bucks for the privilege of sitting in your livingroom.
You're into each other. I get it. You're interested in what each other thinks and feels and that's great. And really, it's lovely that you want to make sure that neither of you misses anything of importance while taking their turn to gaze adoringly at the other. The running commentary you've mastered to avoid this pitfall is really quite convenient. For you. For those of us who don't suffer from similar distractions, however, it's a wee bit irritating to be subject to the SAP setting. Especially when we've shelled out thirty bucks (plus pop, chips and pizza) for the opportunity to pay full snackbar prices at the $3 theatre to see a movie that will probably be out on DVD by the end of the month.
For you, this was just another Saturday night. But for me, this was Saturday Night. Next time, please be aware of the distinction and plan your evening accordingly.
Comments
Oh, Lordy, I can totally relate. I have had the ushers kick out rude, noisy people before. My favourites are those who come to foreign films and read the subtitles out loud to their dates.
When I was a tiny kid, my mom taught me that a huge part of good manners is not irritating anyone around you, or even drawing their attention. I guess more than a few people missed that lesson: they were all at the movies.
Is that is Swanhilde, no one is teaching their kids not to be annoying anymore? Cause I know I'm constantly reminding mine not to be so...annoying.
I hate going to the movies because there are other people there. I'm such a facist with talking at movies-if I rent one no one is allowed to talk.
Sorry, that is not what I meant, hope I didn't offend you. (I know I tend to be uber-snarky.) I meant that people tend to lose or neglect these skills as they grow up and do adult-type things, like talking in the movies or yelling into a cell phone at a restaurant.
oh no! I didn't mean to be like that! I was agreeing with you in wondering if that was the problem! :)
You aren't snarky!!! I was raised the same way, so I'm trying to figure out why people today have such crap manners!
Hi there! Your site is cool!
that was wonderful, I can so relate to that.
that was wonderful, I can so relate to that.
Good site! Good resources here, All the best!
I think I saw that this was your latest blog...it's been a while since you wrote. I'm begging you to share some more! What a great blog!
www.tuppas.com
i know....annoying!good site
Ha! I love it! I never get to go out alone, I love my boyfriend, but would give anything to be alone at a movie. I would have said something to them. I like you never get out, and would have been so annoyed! heheeh you are so funny!
I haven't been to a movie in two years!!! Amazing. Every time I have a chance...it's when I've hired a sitter. So, I don't want to run the risk of spending more money on a bad movie. The funny thing is - I couldn't go to movies when I was married - hence the divorce. My husband wouldn't even give me a back rub, let alone let me get out for a minute. Such a cute and funny story! Thanks for venting on behalf of all of us single mamas.
That was a great post. Well said. Maybe it'll give some of us the courage to actually stand up one of those times, turn around and tell 'em off. Or tell 'em to get a room!
Funny twist on an annoying occurance! Really enjoyed your writing style. Next time spill a bag of butter popcorn on them! :)
