Ann Adams is somewhat of a legend in the parenting blog community--a great grandmother raising a third generation of children (3 beautiful girls) with a patience, style, and passion that is inspiring to behold. She started blogging a couple of years back, after her post-like commenting at the former Blogging Baby lead writer Jen Creer to set her up her own account on blogspot. She's still a frequent contributor to the discussions over at Parentdish, though; in many circles (liberal, leftwing ones, mostly), it's understood that once Granny chimes in on an issue with her trademark compassion and common sense, there really isn't much more to say.
In addition to those aforementioned great-granddaughters, Ann's household also includes Ray, her husband, and Carol, her daughter and Elsie, Rochelle, and Rebecca's grandmother. Ray has a host of health problems that keep him in and out of the hospital, and for the last while Carol has been in hospice care as the ravages of cancer took their toll on her.
Carol's suffering has ended. Ann's, while certainly not beginning, has just taken an awful turn into a mother's worst nightmare. No mother, be she newly minted or a great-grandmother, should be forced to outlive a child. It is heartbreaking, and wrong, and goes against the very notion of the circle of life.
Just before I read the news that Carol was finally at peace, The Ladies were driving me nuts. The whining and the fighting and the just plain ugly they were spouting had me dreaming of an escape hatch--of a world of possibility in which I was not somebody's mother and did not have to care who started it or whether or not the vegetables were eaten before dishing up the ice cream. After though....It's amazing how quickly perspective can shift. Suddenly, the squabbling and stress don't really matter. All that matters is that my girls are here, healthy and whole.
I don't really have the words to express to Ann my sorrow at her loss and she's too far away to hug, so I'll hug my own daughters instead, and hope that she knows that it's meant for her.
Comments
I do know that it's meant for me and thank you.
Hi Solo-mom, Thank you for this wonderful tribute to someone I admire greatly. You
have said all the things that needed to be said. Bless you for that. Good luck for your future with your girls. Thank you again, Love from Australia. Merle.
A lovely post. I don't know Ann, but I feel for her pain and her family.
Amazing what a little perspective brings, isn't it. Deep breath.
