Pinkies Up

FuJi-06.JPG

Today did not start out as a good day. I was in a vile mood all day, annoyed with friends for transgressions both real and imagined and just generally disgruntled with the world at large. The last thing I was in the mood for was sibling bickering and Dora the Explorer as my daily soundtrack. So of course, it was also a P.D. Day.

I really could have used a cocktail playdate today. Instead, I was invited to a tea party.

I didn't want to play tea party. I wanted to surf aimlessly around the net, or read a book without pictures, or go back to bed until the stormcloud over my head had lifted. But I went to the tea party.

And, sitting on the floor of The Ladies' playroom, holding my pinky in the air as I sipped my pretend drink, I realized something. I was having fun. I wasn't grumpy anymore; instead, I was silly, relaxed, and completely enjoying myself. I might not have been sipping the Momtini I had been dreaming of, but my imaginary tea was hardly a pale second choice. In fact, I couldn't think of anything I'd have rather been doing.

Certainly not sitting around, wallowing in my funk. Which is what I would have been doing, along with the laundry and the dishes and the million other day to day drudgeries if The Ladies hadn't forced me to just let it all go for a little while. I'm embarrassed to admit that this is a lesson I've had to learn repeatedly over the years, that the way to enjoy this whole motherhood thing is to often put aside my resistance and my desire to be doing something else and just do it. I've learned it hiding in closets with my giggling toddler, waiting for her sister to find us, in rousing games of peekaboo, in marathon Monopoly sessions that were grudgingly begun, and today, sitting beside the cat, spooning imaginary sugar into a flower shaped teacup with a forgetmenot spoon.

Some lessons are definitely worth repeating, even if you haven't forgotten them.

February 02, 2007 at 10:29pm | Permalink | Comments (5)

Comments

I am looking forward to many years of perspective adjustment, thanks to little Q. Great post!

Posted by Lady M on February 03 at 04:04am

That's so right on, I find myself so often thinking, "no, not another storyreading/endless coloring/game of Monopoly/whatever--I have so much to do!" But when I actually sit down to do something with the kids, it's fun, and I don't really mind that the laundry is piling up, and the dishes are unwashed in the sink.

Posted by landismom on February 03 at 11:16am

Too true. And one day, if you've done it right, you'll be having that 'momtini' WITH your child. :D

I have to stop and remind myself to play with the kids when they ask - because, with the youngest 13, it's a beautiful thing to be asked and shouldn't be wasted!

You should have SEEN me breaking a very decent sweat playing DDR 2* with my almost 18-year-old son!

(*DanceDance Revolution - which is a seriously kick-ass cardio workout, and a helluva lot of fun. AND a bonding experience with your teen. Does it get any better??)

(Oh, and the one I drink with? She's 21.)

Posted by Mary P on February 03 at 07:29pm

It's amazing that we can spend all day with these small people and yet forget that they just want to have fun. I often have to remind myself to relax and enjoy the ride.

Posted by Heather on February 05 at 12:04am

that sucks...i am really sry..but i might be pregant and i am only 16

Posted by rhonda on February 08 at 03:53pm

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About Me

You say "Single Mom," I say "Solo Mom." In my world, it's all about having your priorities in order, and getting my whites whiter than white is never, ever going to be a priority. Helping my girls paste glitter to their artwork, that's a priority. Sometimes I hide in the bathroom to get a bit of peace and quiet. But I never have to share the kisses.

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