Guiding Principles

I never thought while I was filling out the dozens of forms tonight that Brownie registration would turn into a lesson on equal rights. But you seize your teachable moments when they come, and Sabrina asking why she was enrolled in Guiding and not Scouts was nothing if not a teachable moment.

I thought long and hard before I decided to sign my daughter up for Sparks three years ago. First off, I had reservations about signing her up for any sort of structured group activity like this; it's just really not who I am. Once I made the decision, I could have gone with Beavers; it certainly would have made sense since Emmett was a Beaver that year. But for me, and therefore Bree, the Boy Scouts were never really an option.

Part of it was the co-ed aspect. I agree with the Guiding philopsphy that girls need a place where they can be encouraged to shine. I'm not ready to send the Diva to an all girls school, but an all girls club? I think that's a great idea. It might not be important to her self esteem now, but I'm hoping that in her pre-teen and teen years Guiding gives my daughter a place that encourages her to be a strong, positive woman, and to take that confidence out into the co-ed world.

That was only a part of the equation for me, though. And not even the deal breaker. The deal breaker was the different attitudes the Scouts and Guides have towards diversity and equality. I'm not comfortable with the Boy Scouts' approach to "values based education." While I respect the fact that the Boy Scouts and their supporters believe that they are acting in the very best interests of their children and society at large, when a group actively declares that members who, for whatever reason, are unwilling to conform to a specific, narrow view of the world are unwelcome, what they are doing is preaching exclusion and intolerance. And those are values I do not want my daughter internalizing.

So, on our walk home Sabrina and I talked about how people are different. They believe different things about the universe, they love different people, and they are all entitled to a place in this world regardless of their differences. I think that in light of Sabrina's recent difficulties at school, this was a particularly timely conversation to have. As Sabrina put it, "everybody should be allowed to play. That's why I'm in Guides."

Comments

I just love the cookies.

My mother gave me 5 minutes to join the brownies as a child, and I said no. i changed my mind shortly after, but it was "too late"

I think she just didn't want to bother.Guides always creeped me out anyway.

here I am again, finding myself nodding along as I read. Briar is in Pippins (the New Zealand version of Sparks) and I made the choice because I wanted her to have the chance to shine as a girl. If you weren't a world away I'd invite you for coffee so we could compare notes. Oh and today I discovered we have a "Brooke" another Heather type so we shall wait and see where it goes from here.

Thordora: I never even got that much of a chance at Brownies. All the "cool" girls in my class were doing it, so I begged to join up too. My mom just flat out said no. I was devastated, until I saw the dorky uniforms. Plus, she was possibly right--large groups of girls do NOT tend to be my thing.

Kate: I'd totally love to have coffee with you. And I'm so sorry Briar has her own Heather to deal with. Why do these types of girls persist? ANd how in the name of all that is holy do we stamp them out? (The type, not the actual Heather.)

Well, I have a boy and it puts a little different spin on the Guides v. Scouts issue. I would have liked to put Emmett in an all boys venue so that he can interact with men and other boys and lets face it, do guy things. I can't. Now to be fair to the little girl who is in Emmett's cub group, she fits in better than some of the boys but is that the point.
I guess what I am trying to say is be thankful you have a choice. I may not agree with everything Cubs stands for but I appreciate the effort they make to teach many of the things that a lot of us can't, won't or don't have the time for.

I agree with you Susan. Another reason Bree is a Guide is because I don't agree with making the Boy Scouts co-ed either. I think that both little boys and little girls need to have a place where they can just be without the pressures of interacting with the opposite sex. Not that there's anything wrong with that, and not that the boys should do "manly" things while the girls learn to cook and sew. But they need some time away from that pressure cooker to explore and shine on their own.

I hope Emmett enjoys Cubs this year....Is Elizabeth going to be a Spark? :)

Elizabeth will hit the big world of Sparks next year. It turns out that it is held in our school just down the street. YEAH!!